The Rose family have had a pretty steep fall from grace, with the world as they knew it unglamorously collapsing around them. They’ve lost plenty: wealth, home, friends and status. As well as careers and, over time, youth. While weathering this storm, their refreshing relationship sees the whole family pull through. So what’s their super power?
Despite the indignities suffered, they do not attack this in the other. Instead they can separate their own feelings of distress from that of their spouse, which allows them to support each other. There’s a lot of tenderness and affection between the two. She can relax because of his seeming leadership, whilst he benefits from her eccentric bursts of energy. He indulges her quirkiness and anxieties, providing a safe haven for her. Perhaps most importantly, they respect and tolerate this in each other. They accept their difference and so don’t feel threatened. Perhaps the very fact they are so different, keeps any feelings of rivalry at bay. “If you desire a love with longevity, the key is to have as little in common as possible” lectures Moira to her adult daughter. “Your father and I still astonish each other”. This is this couple’s specific dance and it works for them.
They have the ability to be both, individuals as well as be part of a couple and negotiate this tension well. They can allow themselves to be strong and fragile and swap these roles effortlessly, keeping them in balance. She knows which buttons to press to get what she wants by stroking his vanity, making him feel important. He in turn accommodates her high octane emotions, being there for her unwaveringly.
The Roses use humour and clearly enjoy each other’s company despite the length of their relationship. And speaking of the length of their relationship, it surely doesn’t stop them having a spicy sex life. They know they are important to each other and make an effort to nourish this. When hitting emotional difficulties or feeling fragile, they don’t hold back but express this, sometimes in unusual ways, but it gets understood in the end.
They’re a delight to watch and they achieve that the whole is greater than the sum of its parts.
You will be missed Mr and Mrs Rose.
